The Favour Feud

There’s no denying it, weddings are an expensive business. And with the costs of getting married rising every year, the modern bride is always looking for a way to cut the costs without cutting out the style. One of the most traditional wedding elements has been the latest tragedy, and that’s the favours. It’s something that’s caused a bit of dispute among brides and professionals, some saying they are still a lovely and traditional thing to do, others saying they are just a pointless waste of time. But should you have wedding favours, are they really worth it?

Yes, Yes Yes!

Wedding favours were originally a gift given by the bride to acknowledge and thank every friend or family member who shared in her special day. And the original wedding favour wasn’t extortionately expensive either- the bride would give 5 sugared almonds to each guest, wrapped in a delicate and attractive tuille bag or a box. Each almond symbolised a different wish for the couples future: Health, Wealth, happiness, Long Life and Fertility.

Now a favour is seen to be something more personal and unique to the couple, and there are all sorts of wonderful new ideas out there – from giving seeds, smoore’s kits or even personalised Lego mini-figs. It’s a chance for the couple to get creative in the way they thank their guests, and it’s usually one of the more fun elements to the planning. They don’t have to be expensive either – I know many brides who have given home-made favours on their wedding day. Wedding photographers Moore & Moore say:

‘We love the idea of non-traditional favours. It gives the guests something really special and unique to remember your day by – and makes for some great photos when they open them too!’

But for some, favours can be a touching addition to a special day. Take Kelly and Simon Langston, who gave home-made toffee apples to their guests as a tribute to their Halloween themed wedding, and their personal struggles.

No, No, No!

Sure, it’s traditional, but what’s the point, really? I mean, you could make them yourself – but that means spending the day before your wedding wrapping up biscuits or sticking labels to little potted plants for every guest – which isn’t exactly what a bride to be wants to be doing on the eve of her wedding! You could be spending that precious time drinking champagne, having a nice meal and celebrating with your friends and family. Get your nails done ready for the big day or just watching a movie with your bridesmaids in your pyjamas doing the ‘I’m getting married in the morning’ dance. I know I will be!

The point is, favours are an element of the day that doesn’t really affect anything. It doesn’t make the day better, and I can’t count the number of weddings (including my own relatives!) that I’ve come home from and the favour has just been thrown away. I always feel a little bit bad – because the bride and groom probably spent a lot of time, money and effort on them – but they’re always useless. With so much else to plan and do – favours are the last thing you should be thinking about.

A Happy Middle Ground?

So is there a happy middle ground in the favour feud? Well each couple is different, and some might prefer to give lavish favours while others give nothing at all. It doesn’t make a huge impact on the day either way, and it’s all down to personal preference. If favours are your bag, I say go for it. There are some great tips on choosing unique wedding favours to reflect your personality here. But if you’re not fussed, then don’t worry! There are plenty of other wedding elements that require your attention and love.

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